We return from commercial with Truman Harrys standing in the ring with the match card in his hand. There are two cables crisscrossing about his head.
Harrys: The following contest is an Ultimate X Match! First contestant to retrieve the "X" suspended above the overhead wires will get to challenge for either the Eurasian or the Elite Openweight Championship!!!
Callie struts out onto the stage and strikes a pose. She is wearing the same outfit Britney Spears wore in the music video "Oops!...I Did It Again", a red space jumpsuit. She gets into the ring and strikes the pose again.
Harrys: Introducing first, from New York, New York, weighing 100 pounds, Callie Clark!
Cohen:She has to be the favorite to win this already. Callie has been on something of a roll lately here in WZCW. She is small, yet she is fierce.
Copeland: Did you just compare her to Shakespeare's work?
Harrys: And her opponent, from Palm Springs, Ca, weighing 175 pounds, Alice "Baby Doll" Adams!
Alice slowly and seductively walks down the ramp, and takes her time getting into the ring and adjusting her wardrobe. She gives the front row a little leg before going to an adjacent corner.
Cohen: I tell ya, that entrance never gets old. She's got legs for days.
Copeland: Careful now. Don't let Keith Kole hear you.
Zhanshi brazenly runs down the ramp at breakneck speed. He slides in and slaps his chest, instructing the two women to smack him around if they dare.
Harrys: And their opponent, from Hong Kong, China, weighing 245 pounds, Zhanshi!
Copeland: Well. That was quicker than his usual entrance.
Cohen: You shut your cuck mouth. A man has stepped inside the ring.
Copeland: My mouth is ...what?
Elizabeth Prince calls for the bell to start the match.
DING DING DING
Zhanshi orders the two women to service him. They walk up to him suggestively, swaying their hips. He gets excited like a schoolboy on a field trip. Adams and Callie Double Clothesline the horny martial artist to the mat. Together they pummel him until Liz pulls them apart.
Adams and Callie give a respectful nod to each other before locking up. The dancer loses her footing, Callie grabs her head as she flails to the ground, and executes a shoddy Running Bulldog. It looks like it seriously hurt Adams - she cradles her face and rolls on the canvas in pain. Before Callie can give a satisfying grin Zhanshi is upon her, Karate Front Kick! Both Adams and the social media starlet are down and Zhanshi glances up at the big silver "X" hanging loosely above him. He jumps for it, but it is quite out of reach - suspended at least fifteen feet off the ground. He yells something in Japanese. Adams grabs hold of one of his legs, and he stares down at her in confusion. Callie is back up, runs the ropes, and Sling Blades Zhanshi. Adams kips up and delivers a back elbow to the nape of Callie's neck. All three find themselves on the ground. The "X" sways a little on its latch.
Cohen: Even fight so far.
Copeland: Not sure who I should be rooting for though.
Callie is the first up, and she begins to climb the turnbuckle. Zhanshi and Alice get back up at the same time, spot Callie, and just as she pulls herself up on the overhead cable, they team up - in unison climbing the turnbuckle and grab a leg. Callie comes crashing down in a top rope powerbomb. She writhes on the mat. Adams with a Swinging Neck Breaker to Zhanshi before attempting the turnbuckle again. She is met by Zhanshi, who quickly scaled the opposite side, together they hang above the ring, clutching the wires. The "X" bounces at the weight applied.
The trendy superstar rolls back to her feet, notices her opponents above her, and stomps her foot. She gets out of the ring in search of a weapon to bat them off. Zhanshi and Adams start to kick at one another. Callie finds a steel chair and throws it at Zhanshi, but misses. He laughs, and is kicked off the wire. He lands haphazardly. Adams reaches for the "X" as Callie slides back in, picks the chair back up, and swings for Alice's legs. Adams hangs in there, kicking at her. Callie swings again, Adams lifts her legs up to dodge, and leaps off, Mule Kicking Callie's chest. They crumple to the ground.
Callie crosses her arms, signaling an X to the referee. Elizabeth Prince sees this, and summons medics. Zhanshi and then Adams are instructed to stand in opposite corners of the ring until Callie is carted out. EMTs come in with a stretcher. They delicately place the wrestler on it and tote her out of the ring and up the ramp.
Copeland: Oh wow. Callie is out of the match!
Cohen: It was a vicious kick, but I didn't realize it put her in that much physical pain. Godspeed.
Elizabeth restarts the Ultimate X, and both competitors come out swinging, one right hand from Zhanshi, one right from Baby Doll, and it continues until Zhanshi is forced into a corner. Alice places her boot up against his throat and stretches a shapely leg. Audience is unsure if Zhanshi enjoys this or not. Adams lets go, uncertain herself. Zhanshi grabs her and throws her into the turnbuckle. The martial artist uses her as a step ladder, leaping onto her shoulders and hoisting himself up to grasp the cable. Baby Doll wraps his legs around her neck and attempts to powerbomb...Zhanshi loses his grip, together they flail and ...Zhanshi smacks the "X" with the back of his hand. The item drops to the canvas! The botch leaves the crowd laughing. Adams and the Asian superstar are semi-conscious on the canvas as Prince looks around, unsure what to do.
Copeland: Did...Zhanshi win?
Cohen: I don't envy Elizabeth. Embarrassing.
Prince takes the X and silently climbs the turnbuckle. She extends a hand out to try and capture the wire to hang off of. The fans in Las Vegas give her their support:
"Give Her A Raise!" "Give Her A Raise!" "Give Her A Raise!"
Alice Adams kicks at the downed Zhanshi, and he returns with a left fist. Elizabeth Prince struggles with the X and holding the wires with both hands, so she sticks the hook in her mouth. She is halfway to the center with the live crowd buzzing wildly. Adams and Zhanshi are back to their feet, and Zhanshi nails her with a Scoop Power Slam. He watches Liz climb, smiles, and goes to the opposite corner. He is onto the turnbuckle, and scales the wires himself. Zhanshi barks at Katie to toss him the X in broken English. Elizabeth refuses, telling him to get down and let her fasten the X. He says no. He wants X (read that out loud slowly). Elizabeth says get off. He says he's trying to. Alice Adams finds the chair Callie left and smacks him in the ass with it. Zhanshi drops.
Elizabeth begins hooking the X back up in its proper place. Adams sets the chair up on its legs. Zhanshi kips up and delivers a Jumping Roundhouse Kick to Adams. She collapses onto the chair. Satisfied, he turns his attention back up at Elizabeth. Not seeing him, Prince plops down onto his face. All three are down when Callie Clark's music hit again.
Copeland: Waaait...
Callie Clark, apparently recovered, skips down the runway and climbs the steel steps. Once onto the turnbuckle post, she wraps a hand around the wire, and then another, and then another. Everybody is still squirming on the mat. She reaches the "X", and unhooks it. Even without a referee signal, the timekeeper is there and sees the outcome. He rings the bell.
Harrys: Here is your winner, Callie Clark!!!
Copeland: Are you kidding me? Was that all some contrived ruse? Why? Why go through all that and just run in like she owns the place? Poor Prince just got the damn thing back up!
Cohen: Callie does own the place. She's next in line for the title - whether it is Elite or Eurasian. All up to her now. You saw at Lethal Lottery how crafty she can be. Tonight was just a reminder. You say it's immoral, I say it's playing the game.
The victor wraps herself where the cables intersect and sits atop the structure. She waves at the booing fans and, after, placing the "X" in front of her, blows the camera a kiss.