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Thread: Spidey's Snack Shack | Cult/Horror Review & Recipe Thread

  1. #31
    Write Forever Spidercanrana's Avatar
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    #23: Dead Alive



    Theatrical Release: August 13, 1992



    Appetizer: US Billboards Top Song At The Time

    Click for Spoiler:

    "End of the Road" By Boyz II Men (August 9, 1992 - November 13, 1992)



    Dead Alive (or Braindead) is a New Zealand dark comedy/zombie horror movie written and directed by Peter Jackson. Considered by many critics to be "the goriest fright film of all time", this flick bombed at the box office but managed to develop a cult following after Jackson became successful with the Lord of The Rings movies. This movie was suggested by Jeff Deliverer of Mail.

    As far as technical aspects including special effects goes...yeah. This movie goes above and beyond the $3 Million budget it was given - to put this in perspective, The Room had a $6 Million budget (adjusted for inflation, Dead Alive still doesn't top it). So with what little Jackson had, he did wonders. The gory scenes are indeed cringe-inducing and I can't even describe how over the top it is. I grew up on Evil Dead and Troma films and this movie manages to give them a run for their money. Just slapstick shlock all around - lighting, environment, acting, makeup/prosthesis, you name it. And when we get to the house party...oh man. A delightful hellscape cometh.

    This film is a uhhh love story? A matricidal fantasy? Pure gonzo filmmaking? I have no idea. I'm just a kid who tries to make sense of the things he sees on television, but sometimes that fails me. Dead Alive isn't like anything I have seen before, and I've seen some crazy stuff. I can't tell if this movie has a deeper meaning. It sure feels like it sometimes. But the nihilistic comedy offsets that to a degree that it confuses me (but it doesn't annoy). Don't get me wrong - this is not a movie I see myself watching a few more times to get a better picture. It most definitely is the sort of film I would suggest to friends to watch them squirm though. For that it gets points.

    Grab some rope and tie yourself in for a left turn into absurdity. Don't forget to leave a tip and kick some ass for The Lord.

    💀 💀 💀



    Tonight's Special: Simple Custard

    When the WLWL are invited over for a meal, this dessert really gets the blood going.



    INGREDIENTS (Serves 8)

    4 cups of milk
    4 eggs
    3 tablespoons cornstarch
    1 tablespoon vanilla extract
    1 teaspoon butter
    1/2 cup white sugar


    1. Cook and stir milk, vanilla extract, and butter in a saucepan over medium heat until simmering. Remove mixture from heat before it comes to a boil.

    2. Whisk eggs, sugar, and cornstarch together in a bowl until sugar dissolves.

    3. Set saucepan back over low heat. Pour in egg mixture slowly, whisking constantly, until custard thickens enough to coat the bottom of a spoon, 5 to 10 minutes.

    -not to be confused for #7's Egg Custard-

    Stop by Spidey's Snack Shack and get yourself a bite!

  2. #32
    I Stay Blasted Yaz's Avatar
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    Bought it, watched it twice, saw no deeper meaning past, Peter Jackson writes a cannon King Kong universe zombie story where a guy kills zombies with a lawnmower.

    This is cannon in that universe by the way.

  3. #33
    Write Forever Spidercanrana's Avatar
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    hint

    For real? Huh. I wonder if that island of rat monkeys harbored one with Gigantism.


    It's time I reinvented an old recipe here at The Diner. I've whipped up quite a batch of Horror lately with the occasional romp in drama and dystopic, and I'll tell you what - I need a change of pace. Time for me to kick my multiple legs up and take it less serious around here. Time for me to pull something out of the ol' icebox here up front and tickle my sweet tooth. Time for me to relax my spoopy mind and think back on the good old days of white Broncos evading the police at 40 mph. The days of Michael Jordan returning to the NBA toa hero's welcome. Back before there was such a thing as a Pokemon.

    Back when moviegoers thought Alicia Silverstone was the future...but that's, like, whatever...


    Come back soon, my friends.
    Last edited by Spidercanrana; 11-03-2018 at 02:56 AM. Reason: hint hint hint hint

    Stop by Spidey's Snack Shack and get yourself a bite!

  4. #34
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    #24: Clueless

    #24: Clueless


    Theatrical Release: July 19, 1995


    Appetizer: US Billboards Top Song At The Time

    Click for Spoiler:

    "Waterfalls" by TLC (July 8 - August 19, 1995)




    Clueless is the retelling of the fantastic Jane Austen novel Emma but now set in Southern California. It's a coming of age RomCom about a young socialite in search of a boyfriend. This film is a cult classic, mostly receiving positive reviews. Famous for popularizing the phrase "As if!" (you know you've heard people say this), and for also placing Alicia Silverstone in the Who's Who of Hollywood at the time. Clueless also starred Paul Rudd and Brittany Murphy. It made 56 Million at the Box Office - more than triple its budget. There was also a TV series, a musical, and various books based on the movie. Obviously a nostalgic time capsule of a flick, but does it hold up?

    Well, duh. Excellent casting across the board. Alicia is remarkably likeable playing a spoiled rich highschooler on top of the social ladder. Rudd is always charming, and Brittany was in her element as the ditz-turned-social monster. It's strength lies in its dialogue, and I couldn't help but chuckle throughout. Amazing how dumb acting characters can smartly turn a phrase here.

    Though this movie isn't without problems. Major issue I had was all the voice narration. Most of the time it added nothing but an attempt at a joke here and there. Baaad Diary of a Mad Black Woman vibes there. If I can follow what is going on if I muted the scene, then I don't really need the character telling me how they feel or what they're about to do. Also the lingo felt forced at times. I know it was going for that blurred line of funny because they're making fun of the stereotypes, but still that can be a little grating. Cher also falls in love with someone that I feel is a tad too close to home and I can't press on that very much without spoilers, but to be clear the Austen novel was different in that regard.

    Still, it doesn't take itself seriously and I enjoy that. This is not Mean Girls but it holds up well with the amount of great quotes it has. May wanna wash this one down with a glass of milk.

    💀 💀 💀 1/2




    Tonight's Special: Chocolate Chip Cookies

    "Whenever a boy comes you should always have something baking."



    INGREDIENTS (48 Servings)

    3/4 cup granulated sugar

    3/4 cup packed brown sugar

    1 cup butter, softened

    1 teaspoon vanilla

    1 egg

    2 1/4 cups all-purpose flour

    1 teaspoon baking soda

    1/2 teaspoon salt

    1 package (12 ounces) semisweet chocolate chips (2 cups)

    1 cup coarsely chopped nuts, if desired


    1. Heat oven to 375║ F.

    2. In large bowl, beat granulated sugar, brown sugar, butter, vanilla and egg with electric mixer on medium speed or mix with spoon until well blended. Stir in flour, baking soda and salt (dough will be stiff). Stir in chocolate chips and nuts.

    3. Drop dough by rounded tablespoonfuls about 2 inches apart onto ungreased cookie sheet.

    4. Bake 8 to 10 minutes or until light brown (centers will be soft). Cool 1 to 2 minutes; remove from cookie sheet. Cool on wire rack.

    Stop by Spidey's Snack Shack and get yourself a bite!

  5. #35
    I Stay Blasted Yaz's Avatar
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    Legit question here. I do like Clueless, but how can you say it holds up with the forced lingo? The lingo was a big part of why this film is remembered, but no one (well almost no one) still uses those phrases. The film is still solid, I can still turn it on and get a kick out of it, but the dialogue and lingo here is just a tier above Mallrats for me in regards to how horribly it has aged.

  6. #36
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    I don't mean the lingo held up. It was a bit cringey when characters made the W finger sign while exclaiming "Whatever!" and don't get me started on Dionne's boyfriend. But other bits of dialogue were fantastic. Cher correcting Josh's girlfriend on Shakespeare for instance. Or Cher's vanity played for laughs. "Searching for a boy in high school is as useless as finding meaning in a Pauly Shore movie" was golden. I thought the conversations the characters had were loaded with cleverness I didn't expect from characters that could be described in a few words. I can see why you wouldn't like it, it is a time capsule and to compare it to RomComs today it hasn't at all aged well (though there were bits about homosexuality that wasn't made into a joke and it should get brownie points for that).

    I wouldn't say the quotes outside of "As if!" are memorable or anything, but they were decent stuff for a high school flick. Then again my experience with these kinds of films range from psycho killers to Mean Girls and that's about it.

    Stop by Spidey's Snack Shack and get yourself a bite!

  7. #37
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    Watch Party #1: Silent Night Bloody Night (1972)

    WATCH PARTY


    Silent Night Bloody Night (1972)



    This time of year is a busy one for your hash-slingin' arachnid, so instead of serving up a new order right away, we're gonna have ourselves a little party. This year I'm going with the non-classic called Silent Night Bloody Night. Eventually I'll get a review up for it, but for now all patrons are more than welcome to watch it with me and draw their own conclusions on whether it sucks or not (public domain!). Do you dare press play and risk watching a terrible movie? It is in your hands my friends.

    Seasons Greetings from my little diner on the edge of town to yours. SantÚ!
    Last edited by Spidercanrana; 12-24-2018 at 12:17 PM. Reason: Mistakenly removed due to sexual content. No nudity is shown in this film. Not to be confused with Silent Night Deadly Night

    Stop by Spidey's Snack Shack and get yourself a bite!

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  9. #38
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    #25: Silent Night, Bloody Night

    #25: Silent Night, Bloody Night




    In Theaters: November 17, 1972


    Appetizer: US Billboards Top Song At The Time

    Click for Spoiler:


    "I Can See Clearly Now" by Johnny Nash (November 4 - November 25, 1972)



    Silent Night, Bloody Night aka Night of the Dark Full Moon aka Death House (or Deathhouse) is an American horror that brings to mind the slasher genre but also has roots in psychological drama. Set during Christmas Eve, a man inherits his family's estate that was once a mental correctional facility. A string of murders happen shortly after. This movie is notable for having a cast that were in the famed artist Andy Warhol's inner circle - Mary Woronov, Ondine, Candy Darling, Kristen Steen, Tally Brown, Lewis Love, filmmaker Jack Smith and artist Susan Rothenberg. This movie should not be confused with Silent Night, Deadly Night (I made that mistake) and is in the public domain.

    It is also notable for being one of the first horror films to use the "telephone call to the victims" trope seen in movies such as Black Christmas, When A Stranger Calls, One Missed Call, and Scream.

    Ever watch a movie where you kinda trudge through, see blips of brilliance, and poof, the end? That's how I felt watching this movie. It was serious enough to not fall under camp, but it was also not serious enough to give enough realism to its characters. Atmosphere is impeccable minus the bad lighting when it's shot outside in the night. Acting wasn't great but it wasn't laughably bad - in the end I kinda wished it would be. This horror is fairly conventional with a mystery killer murdering people mostly off-screen. Outside of the two big twists in the film (and they're pretty great, but not decent enough to want to sit through this movie again),it was all played up more like a made for TV movie. I have a pet peeve about narration that tells us something we can figure out on our own visually, and this flick does it repeatedly.

    Those blips of brilliance come to the viewer through flashbacks and even though it tried to give the flick some subtext about mental health, it wasn't enough to deliver a proper message. Conflicted, even. At the very least, I found the last ten minutes or so fairly riveting though I wished there was more bloody build.

    For me, this movie didn't have enough period. It confused itselg into being a soap, a gothic tale, a horror, and a budding slasher but not enough to leave any lasting impression on any of the aforementioned genres - save the phone calls. To put it bluntly, it made me yearn for the end. If you were one of those that attended the Watch Party, I'm so sorry. I thought this one had the psycho Santa Claus guy in it.

    May want to pair this one with eggnog. It's marked down, cuz it ain't Christmas no more.

    💀 1/2




    Tonight's Special: Old Fashioned Fruitcake

    It's a holiday treat that's not really a treat. Also, a synonym for people suffering from their cognitive faculties.






    INGREDIENTS (Serves 16)

    1 Cup Butter, Softened

    2 1/2 Cups Sugar

    6 Eggs

    2 Tablespoons Brandy Flavoring

    4 Cups All-Purpose Flower

    1/2 Teaspoon Cinnamon

    1 Teaspoon Nutmeg

    1 Teaspoon Salt

    1 1/2 Pounds of Ready Mix Candied Fruit

    1 Pound Seedless Raisins

    3/4 Pound Candied Pineapple

    3/4 Pound Whole Candied Cherries

    2 Cups Pecan Halves

    Light Corn Syrup And Pecan Halves (For Garnish)



    1. In a large bowl, beat butter, sugar and eggs with an electric mixer until fluffy, adding eggs one at a time until yolk dissapears. Stir in flavoring.

    2. Sift together next 4 ingredients and mix thoroughly with butter and egg mixture. Work the fruit and nuts into batter with hands. Grease and flour a 19" tube pan.

    3. Fill pan 2/3 full with batter. Bake at 275░ for 3 hours. One-half hour before cake is done, brush top with corn syrup. Decorate with pecan halves and finish baking. Cool. If desired, place cake, wrapped in a wine-soaked cloth, in an airtight container. Store in a cool place for several weeks; this blends and mellows the cake.

    Stop by Spidey's Snack Shack and get yourself a bite!

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  11. #39
    Senior Member Jeff Deliverer of Mail's Avatar
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    Grab some rope and tie yourself in for a left turn into absurdity. Don't forget to leave a tip and kick some ass for The Lord.

    The above quote is great Spidey. Thanks for reviewing Dead Alive. One of my favorite Comedy/Slasher/Gross out movies ever.

    New request: The original Poltergeist!

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